something greater

yes, finally a positive day.
Finished my monologue+duologue.
So happy that I improved.
Mr B commented I'm becoming more comfortable in my own skin.
I am really starting to be more confident and more 'in the moment' as an actor. :D
I want to do well for A levels, and make my parents proud :D


And before I walked out of school today, Ms Ng stopped me to tell me that she wants me to be a CLIC facilitator.
It was really surprising, because I didn't participate in CLIC (actually I really wanted to :( ).
I was so flattered la!!! And it really boosted my mood, especially after a shithole of a week.
But ugh, I will be having TSD exams then, so I can't make it as a CLIC facilitator, as much as I want to. Maybe God will find some way to open another door for me.

Anyhow, I'm already feeling good about getting such an acknowledgement.
I think being someone with few skills, I've started to become immune to taunts and people looking down on me.
Praises/acknowledgements really make me feel so much better as a person.
I always feel that I try so hard and the only shit I can do is study.
I know a lot of people want to have the discipline to study, but then being in VJC, everyone can study as well.
So basically, I can't do any shit.

But I'm really working hard to find out what I like.

I really hope I can open the concept store I want to open, and open branches overseas. And then have a chain of stores specialising in different things. I think I really just want to be a part of everything.
Growing up, I realised that my dreams and hopes aren't that graspable. It's dangerous in a way, because I'm merely hoping for something which is quite vague, like being successful. But, I guess in a way, it's making me happier when I make progress.

Can't wait for orientation. It's going to be a blast. :)